I can’t speak. Here’s how I get people to listen | Jessica Irwin | TED

I am Jessica Irwin,

and I have never spoken a single word in my life,

even to say my name,

nor the vital word of "stop."

The truth is, I have so much I would like to say,

many witty comebacks rolling around inside my head.

Through typing on my communication device,

I can express about 25 percent of what I want to say.

The other 75 percent stays trapped inside my head,

for only me to hear.

This happens every single day.

Why is this?

I have a level of cerebral palsy

that means my mouth muscles simply won't allow me to physically talk.

That is the sole reason.

Let's focus on slowly sounding out the letter J.

Did you feel your tongue on the back of your teeth

as you sounded the letter out?

I am unable to move my mouth and tongue that way,

which means the only way you can hear my intelligent thoughts and ideas

is when I type them out for you on my communication device,

at the rapid speed of seven words per minute.

The robotic voice outputs what I'm saying,

but it doesn't express my quick wit.

Nor can it quickly express something in an emergency?

Imagine seeing your little niece about to touch the hot stove.

"Gracie, stop."

I am unable to quickly say those words.

My only hope is that I can manage to push her over --

with love.

Many nonverbal people spend a lot of time in hospitals.

We enter a system that is brilliant at some things,

but untrained in hearing voices like ours.

So it becomes a place of fear.

Many people in my situation

can't physically use our communication devices

when we are lying down.

Our voices are suddenly not there.

Imagine lying in a hospital bed with an injured hip,

with wounds and bone fractures.

A nurse comes up to your bed,

bypasses your notes and goes to roll you straight onto your injured hip.

What can you do to prevent the extreme pain that you know is coming your way?

Absolutely nothing.

You can't say the single word "stop."

I mean, you can start crying,

but you are on pain medication that has a side effect of irritability.

This is misinterpreted by the nurse as the patient is just fussing

because they don't want to roll.

And your only option is to brace for the extreme pain and

take it like a nonverbal person.

This is not hypothetical.

It has been my horrifying reality.

This is why I'm bringing communication training into hospitals.

I don't want other patients to experience unnecessary pain.

And here's the brilliant thing --

this problem is solvable.

All it takes is knowing one simple thing.

Assume the patient is intelligent,

ask yes and no questions,

and ask them to ...

look up for "yes" and look down for "no."

Let's try it together.

If you're with me, look up for "yes."

Now look down for "no."

Awesome.

Just like that, without a single spoken word,

we've had a conversation.

This also works for complex scenarios

like "Are you in pain?"

"Do you want me to call someone?"

"Can I examine where you are hurting?"

"Can I run through the alphabet so you can spell out a word

by looking up [at] the correct letter?”

Four simple steps. But they can save a life.

Sometimes, people ask me to squeeze their hand to signal "yes."

In my type of cerebral palsy, I have a high involuntary muscle grip,

so my hand muscles will begin to involuntarily squeeze

like a bear trap.

You will be thinking, "Why isn't she letting go of my hand?"

And I will be thinking, "Bollocks.

My hand won't let go.

I'm stuck and they don't know."

It’s hilarious sometimes.

Here’s the thing: cerebral palsy is a brain injury,

and when people hear the words "brain damage,"

they automatically jump to intellectual impairment.

But when somebody has brain damage,

it should not mean their entire brain should be disregarded.

My case affects movement, not intelligence.

Being nonverbal doesn't mean we don't have opinions and knowledge to share.

We often get loudly spoken down to and patted on the head,

because people just don't know how to approach us.

So here's a tip.

Simply start a conversation with "Hi, my name is ..."

and just let the conversation grow from there.

There's no need to talk loudly or slowly.

Speak to us like you would the person sitting next to you right now.

Can you imagine patting them on the head?

How weird would that be?

(Laughter)

And these head-patters

are likely the people [who] assume I’m the one with unusual behaviors.

(Laughter)

Look at our facial expressions and eye movements.

Try humor to see if we laugh.

If we do, that proves we can hear and understand you.

Observe whether we are typing on our communication device.

Look for a digital screen in front of us.

You hold the power to give someone back their voice.

That is a beautiful thing.

So whether you are a professor, doctor, nurse or a future friend,

please try to communicate.

Remember, I'm so much more than my physical appearance.

My name is Jessica Irwin.

I am a photographer, artist, author, keynote speaker

and a human being.

I am just like you.

(Cheers and applause)