Lessonpills

1

Think about these questions before watching. Share your ideas with a partner.

To what extent do you believe your personal ambitions and aspirations are genuinely your own, versus being shaped by the people you admire or follow online?
Reflecting on your social circle and online connections, whose success is more likely to provoke a sense of competition or even envy in you: a global celebrity's, or a former classmate's? What do you think accounts for this difference?
In what ways has the digital age blurred the lines between distant role models and immediate rivals? Consider how accessibility and direct interaction have changed our perceptions of success.

2

Watch the video carefully. Pay attention to the main ideas and key details.

Video script95 segments · click a timestamp to jump

- We all exist in this world where we can tweet at somebody

or engage with somebody,

could even be the President of the United States.

And they might react to us back.

Social media has thrust us all onto the head of a pin,

socially speaking, existentially speaking.

Even if they're on the other side of the planet,

even if they have a lot more money than we do,

we can still interact with them.

We can still compete with them on engagement.

They're inside of our world.

We have a mimetic machine in our pocket

where all of these people exist.

So, what is mimetic desire?

Mimetic desire means that we're adopting

another person's desire as our own,

usually without even realizing that we're doing it.

So, social media has given us millions of mimetic models

that we now have to contend with.

Some people have went from having 10 mimetic models

to now having a million,

and we haven't quite come to grips as a culture

with what that means for our mental and emotional health.

There are two kinds of mimetic models.

The first kind is called an external mediator of desire.

These are models that are outside of our world;

whether because they exist in a different social sphere

than we do,

there's no possibility of us coming into contact with them

and certainly not becoming rivals with them.

They're in some sense, outside of our world of desire,

outside of our world of competition.

Now, these external models of desire

can be real, or they can be fictional.

The other kind of model is inside of our world

called internal mediators of desire.

These are people that we do come into contact with,

and there is a possibility of conflict

or rivalry with these people.

These are people that are in our family;

these are people in our workplace;

these are people that could even be our friends.

It's easier to compare ourselves to them.

These are the kinds of people that we look to as benchmarks,

and we're far more likely to be envious

of somebody that we went to high school with

who now has a great job and a beautiful spouse,

than we are to be envious

of the richest person in the world.

The danger with external mediators of desire,

with keeping up with people that are very successful,

with people that have modeled a certain kind of lifestyle,

is that there's no end to that process.

All desire is a form of transcendence.

We desire to go beyond the boundaries,

to go just over the mountain,

to be the kind of person

that we don't feel that we currently are.

Having positive models of desire to emulate

is a very good thing.

It's important to have people that model virtues

and goodness that we would like,

but we have to understand the limitations of any model.

And understanding how the dynamic

between us and our models changes in that scenario

is really, really important.

It's also important to understand

when somebody is an internal model of desire to us

because, in that case, we have to have boundaries.

All desire comes from us feeling like we lack something,

and that can bring us into a dangerous, vicious cycle

because there will always be another model to find.

We have to choose our models wisely.

We also have to know when the model

is inflaming us with the desire

for something that's gonna bring real fulfillment

or whether it's going to bring a dopamine hit

or allow us to fantasize about a life

that we'll probably never have.

And even if we did have,

it would probably make us miserable.

All you need to do is go on Instagram

and spend five minutes,

and you see lifestyles modeled,

you see vacation destinations modeled, fashions,

manners of speech, ways of engagement,

ways of speaking, political preferences.

All of these desires are modeled for us 24 hours a day,

billions of them, and we need to understand

the mimetic landscape of social media

or else we'll become totally controlled by it.

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3

Answer these questions in your own words. Support your answers with evidence from the video.

01In what way has social media, as described in the video, altered our social landscape and our relationship with others?

Sample answerThe video suggests it has put everyone 'onto the head of a pin,' meaning our social world is much more compressed. We can now directly interact with and even compete for engagement with people who are far outside our immediate circle, like celebrities or politicians, making them feel like they're a part of our world.

02According to the video, what is the fundamental difference between an external mediator and an internal mediator of desire?

Sample answerThe key difference is their proximity to our own lives. External mediators are outside our social sphere, so there's no real possibility of rivalry—think of a historical figure or a billionaire. Internal mediators are people within our world, like friends or colleagues, which makes comparison, envy, and conflict far more likely.

03The speaker claims that 'all desire is a form of transcendence.' Based on this idea, why can emulating external models of desire become a particularly dangerous or endless process?

Sample answerBecause desire is about wanting to go beyond our current self, emulating very successful external models creates a goal with no clear endpoint. The video implies that since we can never truly reach their status, the process of 'keeping up' becomes an endless, vicious cycle of feeling like we lack something, which can be damaging to our mental health.

04What advice does the speaker implicitly and explicitly give for navigating the 'mimetic landscape' of social media without becoming controlled by it?

Sample answerThe main advice is to be more conscious and selective. We need to choose our models wisely and understand their limitations. It's crucial to distinguish between desires that might bring real fulfillment and those that just offer a temporary 'dopamine hit' or a fantasy. Essentially, we have to actively analyze the desires being presented to us instead of just unconsciously adopting them.

4

Key vocabulary for discussing social influence

Vocabulary

These expressions will help you communicate more naturally and precisely about the complex ideas in the video.

Examples

To live vicariously through someone — to experience something indirectly by watching or hearing about another person's experiences.

Usage note: This is often used to describe how people engage with social media content, experiencing travel, success, or drama through others' posts instead of their own direct actions.

A breeding ground for (something) — a place or situation where something, usually negative, can develop and flourish easily.

Usage note: This is a powerful metaphor. You can say, 'The competitive nature of some online platforms creates a breeding ground for envy and insecurity.'

To keep up with the Joneses — an idiom for the pressure to match the lifestyle, possessions, and social status of one's peers.

Usage note: This phrase perfectly describes the rivalry with 'internal mediators' mentioned in the video. It highlights the competitive aspect of mimetic desire within our immediate social circles.

To blur the lines between (A and B) — to make the distinction between two different things less clear.

Usage note: Use this to discuss how social media changes social dynamics. For example: 'Constant connectivity blurs the lines between our professional and private lives.'

An echo chamber — an environment where a person only encounters information or opinions that reflect and reinforce their own.

Usage note: This term is essential for critiquing online environments. It can explain how mimetic desire intensifies when algorithms show us only people who want and value the same things.

5

Decide if each statement is true or false. Correct the false ones.

01According to the video, the process of adopting another's desire is often an unconscious one.

02The speaker suggests we are more prone to feeling envious of distant, extremely wealthy individuals than of our peers.

03The video posits that all desire fundamentally originates from a feeling that we are lacking something.

04Social media has exponentially increased the number of mimetic models individuals are exposed to, shifting from a small circle to potentially millions.

05External mediators of desire are exclusively real, influential figures who exist in a different social sphere.

6

Complete the sentences with words from the box. One word is extra.

Word bank

01Many people find themselves living through the curated lives of influencers, experiencing a second-hand version of success and adventure.

02The constant comparison and performance on social platforms can create a for insecurity and envy.

03The platform's design seems to intentionally the lines between authentic connection and commercial promotion, making it hard to tell what's genuine.

04If your feed only shows you content that confirms your existing beliefs, you may be trapped in an ideological without even realizing it.

05The lifestyle content he posts is highly , designed to make followers desire a similar level of wealth and freedom.

7

Choose the best answer based on what you heard in the video.

01According to the speaker, what is the primary existential effect of social media putting everyone 'onto the head of a pin'?

02The speaker acknowledges a positive aspect of mimetic models, suggesting they can be beneficial when they...

03What is identified as a key characteristic and potential danger of engaging with 'internal mediators of desire'?

04Which of the following is NOT mentioned in the video as a strategy for managing mimetic desire in the age of social media?

8

Collocations for discussing online life

The phrases below are useful for discussing the psychological impact of social media.

Match each item on the left with the correct item on the right.

Drag or click to match

Definitions

9

Discuss these questions with a partner. Try to use vocabulary from the lesson.

The video suggests social media provides millions of 'internal mediators'. To what extent do you agree that this has turned these platforms into a breeding ground for envy, or do you see them more as a source of healthy inspiration?
Considering the idiom 'to keep up with the Joneses', how has this phenomenon evolved in your country or culture with the rise of social media? Have global influencers effectively blurred the lines and become the new 'Joneses' for many people?
Some argue that carefully curating your social media feed is an effective way to manage mimetic desire. Is this a genuine solution, or does it risk creating a sophisticated echo chamber that simply reinforces a narrower set of aspirations?